Hi, Aunt Carole!

Aunt Carole- My dad told me you wanted me to write to you in this blog and I couldn't be happier to oblige. Thank you for my 4th of July e-card. It was awesome. Sorry I've been so out of touch. I love you dearly. I heard you had a fun trip to see Matt in Vegas. And that you're a terrible backseat driver. That was shocking to hear. Not you! Timid and shy Aunt Carole? I couldn't believe it. Now my dad's going to be mad at me for saying that. But I don't care! This family has too many secrets! We're like the goddamn Corleones!

Oh, hi Dad! How are you? I am fine.
I haven't been doing much, really. Just working. And thinking. What I'm trying to say is that I have nothing to tell you or show you really, per se. Nothing exciting, that is. But why does it have to be exciting all the time? Isn't life just made up of a series of small moments? As Charles Eames once said, "The details are not details, they make the design." Can you tell I'm bullshitting to fill space?

All right, here are my details:
I went to the grocery store and there was a lady carrying this cake over to the bakery section...

Hold the mayo.

Can you believe it? A HAMBURGER CAKE! I actually stopped her and said in a kind of too loud voice, "Are you kidding me with that hamburger cake?" Then I saw her give the security guard an eye signal, so I took this picture and headed for the frozen food aisle. I like walking down that aisle the best. It's always so cold and orderly and well lit. I have a secret dream of one day roller skating up and down the aisles of a supermarket after hours. Get to know me, Dad. 

It is true that I find great comfort and solace in the communal atmosphere of my local food merchant. But I think you'd really appreciate where I shop in Chicago because it's a grocery store conveniently located in...The Playboy Building!

Built on the backs of disempowered women!

That's right, Hugh Hefner's vast empire has their central headquarters right across the street from where I live. It's not really as exciting as you'd hope. The lobby is usually filled with a lot of old men in motorized wheelchairs. I'm not kidding. I think Hef puts up his elderly friends and business associates at a discounted price. They seem bitter, maybe because there's no grotto. 

Umm, what else...

On fourth of July weekend, Danny Ceballos drove in from Wisconsin and hung out with me for the day. We went to the Art Institute of Chicago. It's quite beautiful. Here are some of my favorite pieces of art...

Posture, young lady!

From this painting, I gathered that it's always been hard for smart girls. She's like, "Will you stop objectifying me? I'm trying to read Dante." And the painter is like, "Let's see some ankle!" 

I thought this one was rather extraordinary...

Who doesn't love a bunch of nuns with candles?

This painting is called A Pardon in Brittany by Gaston LaTouche. Danny said his name means "touch my belly" in French. We had a good, quiet laugh over that one. It looks way better in person, obviously. Kinda like someone punched holes in the canvas and put a light bulb behind it, but classier. Frencher.

Here's Danny sketching his favorite painting which I didn't get the name of...

It's not a purse, it's a tote bag.

This was in the Toulouse Lautrec area, but it was by one of his contemporaries. Danny is sketching the lady second from the left. He really liked the fact that she was eating sardines with gloves on. I thought it made her look the fool. 

And here's the biggie...

Go ahead! Stare at it, you lemmings!

It's the legendary Seurat painting, A Sunday Afternoon. The official title is longer, but I don't feel like writing the whole thing. To be honest, I wasn't that into it. I'm not saying it's not impressive or that it doesn't deserve to be flocked to, but the crowd was about six rows deep and some people were getting their picture taken in front of it. I guess so they could take it home and say, "Here's the proof that I looked at this famous painting- a picture of me squatting in front of it, throwing gang signs." The docents had to yell for people not to use flash photography every 30 seconds or so. I walked through this mob scene and then immediately went back over to my nuns with candles painting and did some deep breathing.  

Speaking of art and paintings and things I like, I asked my friend Amy to paint that old picture of me and Laura wearing those Halloween masks you and mom used in 1973. That's what I'm using for my EP cover (EPs are records with less than the regular amount of songs on them.) It turned out to look like this...

This was what childhood was like for me.

Pretty awesome, huh?